Swansea City play Italian giants Napoli in the second leg of the Europa Cup tomorrow (Thursday 27th February,) but the two cities have been inextricably linked for over forty years. In 1974 Local Government was re-organized in England and Wales and the City of Swansea was afforded its first Planning Department. Previously, Planning operated under the umbrella of the Borough Engineer.
The Planning Department made the most of its new found status and appointed a Director ably supported by three Assistant Directors. It was commented more than once, however, that Director Maurice Howell had more ADs than Steven Spielberg. Anyway one of the Three Amigos was Sydney Roper who was responsible for Social Polices, and he had a penchant for the dramatics. He supervised the publication of many, many Interim Planning Statements, and in one of his preambles he compared the topography of Swansea to Rome because in his biopic vision they were both built on seven hills. Furthermore through his rose tinted lenses he likened Kilvey Hill to Mount Vesuvius which overlooks the City of Naples, and compared Mumbles Bay to (wait for it) The Bay of Naples; hence the connection (QED.)
Mr. Roper’s section resembled the de-coders at Bletchley Park during the Second World War. Nobody knew exactly what they were doing, but they were very effective in creating a mist over their activities. One of his senior planners brought a red setter to work and her assistant’s job was to exercise the dog daily and give it food and water when necessary. Luckily for the assistant the beach and promenade were only a stone’s throw from the office, and he and the dog regularly availed themselves of the bracing sea air.
Where was I? Yes, I’m a Swansea Jack and I love the City. Not wishing to denigrate Kilvey Hill, but it has more of the trappings of a slag heap than a picturesque image of a mountain which is arguably the most famous volcano in the world. Don’t get me wrong. Kilvey dominates the East Side of the City and has a charm and character peculiar to its dockland setting. It’s favored by car thieves who regularly dump their booty of BMWs, Mercedes, Audis and possibly in the future Chico Flores’ Ferrari on the hilltop. A point of Clarification; it’s most definitely a hill and not a mountain. For further explanation on the difference between the two when you have nothing better to do, look up the movie starring Hugh Grant: “The Englishman Who went up a Hill and came down a Mountain.”
Now Mumbles Bay is a different kettle of fish given the right circumstances. It’s a beautiful and majestic Bay that curves around the coast for five miles from Swansea to Mumbles. Unfortunately Swansea is very tidal, and when the tide is out the Bay resembles a setting for the mud laden Battle of the Somme. Luckily when its high tide on a warm summer’s evening and the sun is setting over Mumbles lighthouse, the setting is magical and there’s none better.
But didn’t somebody tell Sydney the color of the water in the Bay of Naples was aqua blue compared to the shades of grey in Mumbles Bay? Hmm, shades of grey could be a good title for a book in the future.
Hopefully the small band of Swans supporters attending the away leg in Naples can cast a myopic eye over the Bay of Naples and visualize their beloved Mumbles Bay and pretend for a few hours that they never left home. A few glasses of the local grog and vino could greatly enhance their imagination.